Getting rid of perfection and embracing enough

Getting rid of perfection and embracing enough

Monday, January 23, 2017

“…if we want freedom from perfectionism, we have to make the long journey from “what will people think” to I am enough.” -Brene Brown

I’ve admitted before that I’m a recovering perfectionist and I’ve explained that Well Balanced eating is far from perfect. Today, I share with you why we should not strive for perfection when it comes to our bodies.

Perfectionism, not to be confused with self-improvement or striving for excellence, is a never ending struggle to please everyone in order to avoid discomfort. As Brene Brown defines it, perfectionism is a belief system that fuels this primary thought: If I look perfect and do everything perfectly, I can avoid or minimize the painful feelings of shame, judgement, and blame.

Body shaming is when we tell ourselves we are not good enough unless we have the perfect stomach, the perfect butt or the perfect hair. And if we don’t feel good enough, we tend to judge other people for not being perfect. Then when we are feeling bad about ourselves we blame someone or something for our imperfections.

What we must realize is that our worthiness does not have anything to do with what our bodies look like. I’ve battled with body shame recently, feeling too small and not girly enough. I’m not saying this for pity and definitely not to be judged, but to help us all understand that it is normal for us to feel a little uncomfortable about our bodies. We all fight the voices that tell us, if only I had ____, I would be _____. You can fill in the blanks.

It’s not that we can’t enjoy wearing make-up to feel beautiful or go to the gym to get a fitter body. The trouble is when we start associating our worth with those things.

Your homework: Listen to your inner critic and pay close attention to how much you believe and internalize the things she tells you. It’s important to be mindful of negative feelings but then to let them go, rather than clinging on to the negativity. When you hear your inner voice say things that you would never say to your daughter or your best friend, it is time to replace those thoughts with, “I am enough.”




How I got brave enough to ask for help

How I got brave enough to ask for help

Monday, January 16, 2017


I had not expected that simple cry for a virtual hug on FaceBook would lead to such an outpouring of love and support. Last week, the snowstorm obliterated my work schedule and created a spiral of negativity in my mind. After a particularly rough day, I posted “#Struggling…Prayers welcome” on Facebook. The response was tremendous. I received many comments with words of encouragement from people of different chapters in my life. The positive energy was felt immediately and the week ended very well. 

I was pleasantly surprised and this experience reminded me of how much people want to help each other. It feels good to be needed and nice to support someone else. According to Dr. Christine Carter of Psychology Today, when we are kind to other people we boost our own physical and mental health. Some people report feeling stronger and more energy when they volunteer, while others report less depression and a sense of calmness. 

I was at an office last week and heard a familiar story about the food dumping in the break room. This is a common practice of coworkers to leave leftover cake, cookies, other baked goods, or candy to share with their fellow office mates. We live in a society where processed sugar is often used as a way to show love, comfort, or support. For those who cannot stop at one square of chocolate, one cookie, or a small piece of cake these “gifts” turn into willpower zapping sugar demon experiences. 

It’s that time of year when some of us are feeling extra inspired to become our happiest healthiest selves. This time, let’s not go at it alone. Let’s be the support of loving kindness to each other on our shared journeys. 

Food for thought: 

Are you #Struggling? Is it irresistible treats in the break room or your best friend constantly asking you to go out for pizza?

Often people do not know you are struggling unless you tell them… Being vulnerable can be scary, but it can also be amazingly rewarding. 

We would love to hear how we can help! Feel free to respond or leave a comment below.