Please stop ‘shoulding’ all over yourself

by | Motivational Mondays

Monday, Feb 20, 2017

Last week, one of our tribe members told me “I think I’ve lost my mojo, I just have no motivation!” She’s been working long hours from 7 AM until after 5 PM. She states “I should do some activity in the evening, but I just have no motivation.” I replied, “please don’t should all over yourself.” When we say “I should” we are focusing on the negative or external expectations because the unspoken truth that follows is “but I don’t want” or “I can’t…”  Rather than focusing on should, it’s helpful to accept the reality, be kind to yourself, and make a plan.  

Whether you:

1. Gained weight at the holidays

2. Suffered an injury that required steroids and lead to a 20-pound weight gain 

3. Just plain got busy

There’s hope and a strategy! Let’s reflect how to get back on track and over the speed bumps of life.

The best way to reach your potential is to create a roadmap and revisit the map regularly. We often have big goals at the beginning of the year such as losing 30 pounds or training for a marathon. Big goals are similar to taking a road trip. In order to plan a trip, we need to know the specific destination and what path will take us there (without too many detours!). If your goal is weight loss, you may first want to assess your eating and exercise habits to determine what steps will help you lose weight. 

Create the path 

Start by tracking your food intake and exercise habits to determine what can be improved. If you are mindlessly snacking at the desk or in front of the TV, set a new habit to drink water or unsweetened tea instead.  If you are not getting at least 7,000 steps/day, find ways to include more movement in the day. 

Markers of success

Set up mini goals or milestones along the way. Continuing with weight loss example, perhaps you get to buy a new article of clothing for every 5 lbs you lose! 

Stay on track 

It’s easy to feel discouraged when the scale won’t seem to budge or goes up a pound or two. Consistently checking your weight at least 1 time per week will give you the accountability to stay consistent with your new healthy habits. 

Get a copilot 

There are lots of people that want to support your goals! Tell your family, coworkers, best friend, and other members of your favorite group fitness class about your goals to have a few more people cheering you on. Some days feel harder than others, their support may be just what you need to keep going. 

Food for thought: 

If you find yourself thinking “I should,” pause and consider if it’s really something you want to do? If not, please stop ‘shoulding’ on yourself. Create a roadmap, find an accountability partner, and set the vision so you know what success looks like!

What’s your next well-balanced destination?


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